B DAY!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHH I'm sooooooooooooooooooooo nervous about tomorrow. Am I dong the right thing? What am I talking about of course I am, I'm just scared, surgery is never fun and the biggest downfall is that I will not be able to pick up my little man for 3 weeks. I can hold him but not unless someone picks him up and puts him in my arms! He is gonna not agree to this I can tell you that for sure right now. He has been so attached to me lately, my mom likes to say " he would crawl inside you if he could" meaning he is that attached, and that is the truth.
This weekend went pretty good, I had a few slip ups but I'm not going to be hard on myself about them, live and learn and that is really all I can do. I just wish they and the urges would disappear.
My gf S and I went looking at a house which I hope and think went well but will see what they say. Her mom has already said that she will co-sign for us if she needs to which will be nice. Hopefully we won't need that though. The house is a pretty good size and the yard is HUGE which is great. We decided that we will take the garage and turn it into a playroom for the boys, I told S there is no way I can live in a house that looks like a daycare. Little c has a lot of toys but I have never let my house look like it was run by a kid and I'm not about to start now.
I ended up spending all day with S and her twins which was an experience to say the least! Really her boys a good but so different from C. One of hers is a total bully and the other is a whiner, Chance falls really no where near either, so because of that they all got along pretty well. Which is good!
I am a bit nervous about living with two more kids because I see how stressed she gets with them, but I think it would and will be good for both of us to have some help considering kids tend to listen a bit more to people who are not there parents.
Will see won't we!
My poor body is gonna be so sore I hate the thought of more pain and pain meds, but I also know they will help me sleep through alot of the pain so that is good. ERRRRRRRR how did this all happen?
My sister is still being a royal bitch, no word from her at all which sucks but Im getting used to it I guess, she is such a damn chicken shit!
I get to quit smoking today to which sucks but I know I will feel so much better with out it! Will I ever find a good habbit????? God I hope so!